getting used to HK.
n all smiles is BACK =)
not upset animore

n today. i went cycling. as i was cycling
i saw so many dragon boaters.. canoe ppl
n they were jogging. so darn fit. they jogged faster thaan i cycled! hmpf!
so i decided to be healthier
n shop more! HAHAHAHAHA

n veee is in hall lo! yeys! got a roomie!
its like back in NTU hall with stupid mych! hohoho




a day
felt brave as i took the airbus from the airport myself.
making my way to my aunt's place alone. with my 16plus kg luggage
n my super heavy backpack
tot i was able to count the number of stops so i would know where to stop
but the stops were so far apart that
only counted 1 b4 i fell aslp on the bus
it was sheer luck n perhaps a bit of good memory that i remembered
that western market was near to my aunt's place n i got off there
n tada!
lugged the luggage up the overhead bridge.. afterwhich met my aunt n she insisted on taking it for me
thank u so much. i knew it was darn heavy la!

aniwae. it was a day i felt loved and yet forlorn
felt my best n worst yest
it felt so bad as i wandered ard tsim tsa tsui trying to find the mtr
n even though i didnt realli know the way back n was a bit lost at the mtr station cos i had no map whatsoever with me
i just walked on
even though i was a bit scared.
bt i rather feel scared den to feel so down trodden
like literally trodden upon
my smiles, my actions, my prescence was totally not required
not just not required
but
redundant
which was why i decided to leave n go home.
n my aunty's place is super dark n ulu at nite la!
there were cockroaches etc roaming the streets.
den i got a bit lost.. but just kept walking
n finally found it.
felt so bad that my aunt n grandma stayed up waiting for me
n going out made me feel worse.

but
yo!
im not going to make my hk trip a sad one.. or an emo one! HAHA~
cos yey! vithiya is coming over soon! n we can go shopping eat etc
n den wh n wl r also coming.. but that's in another like month's time?
even though that part of the sms was ignored. but still
i guess its worth some sort of forgiveness. i dunno. but .. ya.
even though i was realli realli upset that i nearly cried on the train.
but.
its over.
n im ok!
still need the tons of energy to go to school. cos the school is ALL HILLS N MOUNTAINS N DAUNTING STAIRS!
so .. the vertical marathon was a good training! haha!

ok. end of the emo post.
bad start. but. that'll end. now =)
at least all these thoughts r out. n r just spat out into this blog
its quite stale now. so i doubt ppl read.
so i can hopefully rant out all my emotions here
ok
sad no more!
HK! here i come! =) all smiles!





this post shall be in pink for thats anita neo's fav colour! n its HER BDAE TODAY! so .. happy happy happy birthday to u LP! =)


this is like one of the few memories of JEC..


n the nite u me n rena met up.. n i had wore formal cos the two of u were working! AH! haha!!

hope u stay happy always! n that come what may
the 3 of us.. the remaining of LSN. will be each other's bridesmaids.. erm. depending on who gets married first! AHAHA =)






haha! just in case ppl in singapore miss my irritating face.so i decided to post this pic!lol =)
aniwaes..
these few days have been damn sian
esp at nite
have been feeling sickish. feverish.. n cant slp
dun tink its anxiety from going hk.. cos.. i kip going.. haha! like.. every year? lol

my body feels like it keeps emiting heat..
n it feels so uncomfy that i cant fall aslp.. :( sian to the max

goin to fly to hk soon.. another few days..
haven packed. haven got ready all my stuffs
shall leave it all to tom
n in case i miss out sth.. as long as its not impt
i'll drag rena to bring me go n buy! HAHA
so thanks in advance!
=)

n yes-si yes-si. i cant slp..
tried to nap a while ago sticking a kodomo on my head..
felt a bit better.. dozed off to a light sleep for an hour plus
C.L.I.F is taking FOREVER to load..
shal watch that.. n hopefully by then i'll b tired enough to fall aslp later!
tom got tuition at 10am! 3 hours.. omg. i tink i'll fall aslp b4 the tuition kid does..
social studies.. nv tot anione social studies b4. but .. it was my fav subject last time.. so
hopefully i can be of some help to the wang xiang zhen girl =)





sometimes
its kind of scary
esp when couples who have been tog for years n years
can end up having relationship problems due to unfaithfulness.
third parties..
sometimes
who do u blame?
the 3rd party?
ur other half who became unfaithful?
or.. yourself?

i guess.. all 3..
well. first of all. i tink the 3rd party should go to hell
because if u already know that someone is attached or married.
den DON GO N BREAK THEM UP ON PURPOSE
esp for those who r sick in the mind n just love to break ppl up not just because it makes u feel good to be able to do so
i guesss.. its ok to like someone who is attached or married
but.. ESP ESP for those who fall in love with someone who is married
i suppose..
the best thing to show that u love that person is to.. not destroy his/her married life?
sometimes i tink love is more wei da when u realli love someone.. giving it your all n not expecting much in return.. or in fact. not even expecting any returns
just because u love someone.. doesnt equate to u having to break up ppl's marriage or intrude into ppl's relationships n having the strong intention of breaking them up.
i tink that is not right.
suddenly. i just feel like slapping someone in the face. but.
aniwaes. i too wish that .. i cant even rem how she looks or sounds like.

also.. the unfaithful spouse. u should also give urself a tight slap.
that u allowed urself to be immersed in this infatuation to the point that
u r immune to the fact that by doing so.. u r hurting someone who has been through years or thick n thin with u .
normally the unfaithful spouse would be in denial. with this strong assumption that he/she is doing nothing wrong. ( which is sth i seriously detest)
or even to the disgusting extent of thinking that. indeed .. that 3rd party is way better den ur husband/wife/bf/gf.
of cos the 3rd party would always seem better.. nicer... because. u two haven got to know each other well enough to see the other side. n def. the beginning of any relationship is always sweet..
these unfaithful spouses will simply continue life as though they have done nothing wrong
and that their other half is overly suspicious or jealous.
but well.. if ur other half become overtly unhappy about u n that other person
den maybe u have stepped over the line. like.. realli .. OVER.
a normal human has certain limits that they can withstand.
when these limits r crossed. that is when no tolerance can be exerted any longer.
n thats when confrontation sets in.

n to the individual who's spouse has been snatched away or is on the verge of leaving you for greener pastures
maybe u could self reflect n see what has happened that has dampened the relationship or has left the relationship so stale that once an intruder appears. the relationship is gone
u dun base a relationship out of pure love.
yes. it may have bloomed from that. but. to sustain it. ultimately.
there needs to be a driving force. a constant spark that has to be created and recreated as time lapses.
ppl say love is everlasting
but somehow
everything that flashes b4 me
seems to tell me otherwise.

so.
if your marriage or relationship has met with such a hiccup
n if that unfaithful spouse turns back
how and what would you do?
would u accept him/her back? n even if u do.. on what basis can you trust him/her once more
or would you let it go n continue life without turning back. to just move on. n let time dampen all these misfortunes?

i realli admire my parents
that despite how different they are( and they are really like polar opposites)
they have been tog for the past 25 yrs of their life.
they insist that it is due to their common faith in god which has kept their marriage till now
that they have not divorced and left for other greener pastures
even though i realli hate it when they quarrel. but
after some thought
i guess.. its ok to quarrel all or most of the time. at least there is confrontation, interaction and understanding of each other's viewpoints albeit the fact that their views may be conflicting..
its still better den having a cold war
having no face to face interaction
n ending up
in
a broken relationship/marriage



holidays well spent with friends n loved ones b4 going to hk! .. ah! no time to finish uploading the rest of the pics.. upload tonite or sth! omg. suddenly i feel so sian that gotta pack .. HAHA! im that lazy. yes-si yes-si.






even though its only for about a month n a half. .
but ..
so fast.. next thurs im gg to fly to hk lo!
first time ever i going for an exchange not for music.. but for studies(ok. plus play n exploration) haha!

actually...
i dunno y im blogging
dun realli have anithing in mind
dun realli have ani words or stuffs that r yearning to be heard

just wondering
how do ppl learn how to trust another again when it was once broken
isit hard? issit easy? issit even possible? to be back to that 100%.. ?




its true how
concern, care, love is often showered through the means of money
how it is perhaps measured by it too

i guess
its true that
actually
to love, to show concern, to bring joy, money is not a necessity.
it only becomes one only when one uses money as a yardstick to measure life's worth

come to tink of it
i was really happy that pipor came to pick me n walk me home.
=)

n today.
i was so so sad when i saw my mother crying
i could feel n see how hurt she was
both by my brother n my father
if only they could see pass what they see
they would come to realize how much my mother loves them.
even more than herself.
n to tink that despite how their jarring words pierced into her heart
she was still constantly asking me what should she buy home for them
what if they r hungry?
that she will try to carry the dog soon..even tho she is v scared of lucy
why didnt they see that in her too?

perhaps everyone thinks im pretty rude to my mum
well. i am
but
sometimes it is this rudeness that takes away a form of formality between ppl that i somewhat hate
it is this flippant manner of relaxed talking, squabbling that makes life. life.
i like being rude to her. i like talking to her in the way i want. not in a manner expected of daughters.
n much as she may complain. perhaps one day when i talk to her n thank her for everything. that would be the day when our relationship is perhaps more strained

when are we polite?
when we are talking to strangers. when we are conversing with someone of higher authority
we are polite around people we dunt really know
perhaps its a form of respect n all or even simply to give a good first impression.
but. at the same time. this kind of politeness or even over-politeness takes away this feeling of closeness and solidarity between ppl, amongst families

definitely
families differ. not all mothers can deal with rude daughters n still be able to lunch tog, talk about how we feel, be it guys, be it about my friends, be it about her friends or about the family.
but
it takes effort to keep a family tight-knitted
everyone has to play a part.
and the essence of love, of family, should not revolve solely around money, the buying of gifts.
because
eternal happiness cannot be bought